im the calmest ive ever been

but i can't seem to stop thinking

im so mad, im so angry, im so happy here. 

this is a hoodie i sewed the fur fur on. the faux fur is removable

i made this with bleach and a spray bottle. i didn't like the way the bottom left turned out. i already cut this off and made it a crop top. i have patches that i will be sewing on to cover up my skin

this is the back, it looks better. i guess its alright. i bought fabric paint but i didnt know it was glittery. its ok, it looks alright. it looks fine

I like these jeans, i just bought them on depop. they were cheap. they have a nice flare, but they smell bad. like sulfur dye. thats pretty common with black jeans. these are acid washed. i soaked them in vinegar. they will soak over night. maybe soaking solves some problems

i love new york city. i fucking hate everyone here. why are they always some dumb fuck leftist? 

i wish i could become my ideal. what even is my ideal? i wish i could be a girl. hm, maybe not. girls can be mean. let me be pretty for at least 10 minutes of the week. i love wearing stocking that cover up all my flaws that my body scarred onto me. bowties are very cute. i bought a hairclip at buffalo exchange the other day. i havent put it on yet, i hid it where i put all my electronics. next to my rtx 5070 ti laptop gpu and my t490 thinkpad, my dads PSP and my sister's nintendo dsi, along with my cricual 1 tb ssd i downloaded linux mint on. my ipad is also in that box. i have a t490 thinkpad, but i dont like it that much. i want a x220. a crt would be nice too. but that would be a bit performative. i think i wanna find a nice, cheap 4:3 monitor. then i'll run linux on it, and make it look like shitty vista. then i'll put winamp on it. i hate nostagia baiters tho, stop trying to be like me.